Just Say No.....

Just say NO.......easier said than done...right??? For a couple of months I cut out chocolate(which I love) and a lot of sugar in my life. I lost about 13 pounds and was starting to feel better about myself and how I looked and how I felt...........UGH!!!!!!!! AND THEN...........I FELL OFF OF THE WAGON........I KNOW.........HORRIBLE!!!!!! I have eaten my weight in sweets over the holidays and I am sick of it...NO MORE!!!!!! As of today those days are OVER....that's right CHOCOLATE......I'm done with you, we are officially broken up. Leave me alone......I do not want you to find me. I do not want you to haunt me in my dreams. I am OVER you!!!!!! I seriously feel like I have a relationship with sugar...LOL. So here goes......I am starting my new year off right.....MORE WATER, NO CHOCOLATE. I am telling you CHOCOLATE...it's for your own good and safety...for when you come around, I would only eat you.....you wouldn't have a chance to melt in my hand!!!!

P.S. I still love you

Christmas 2010

We had a great Christmas other than the fact that Tyler was and still is sick with the FLU. This will be a year he will always remember or rather one he would rather try to forget!!! Poor guy....felt so bad for him. Even through all of the hard times....I truly LOVE my life.....I wouldn't trade it for anyone else's. I am thankful for a husband that loves me, wonderful healthy, happy children. Parents who always take care of me. Wonderful brothers and their wives. Terrific nieces and nephew. A great church with a wonderful pastor. Awesome friends!!!

Year in Review 2010

WOW...I can not believe how fast this year went by. I must say though, I am ready to see it go. The last 2 years of our lives have been filled with many ups and downs. I am so very thankful the Lord has allowed us to be where we are and to be surrounded by the people we are surrounded with. We have truly learned throughout these times the friends that are truly ready to go to bat for us and have our back and are there to pick us up when we fall. Brad and I have learned a lot about each other and I truly love him more today than I did a year ago. We have experienced heartache like no other this year with the passing of "GREAT", Brad's grandmother. You know you expect in someway for your grandparents to die due to old age and sometimes I am sure for some that creates some sense of comfort knowing that they lived a long fruitfull life. Charlotte who we called "GREAT" was like no other woman I had ever met. Her death was harder on me than any other death I had experienced in my lifetime. I am tearing up just thinking about it. She was beautiful, she was kind, she was generous, she was caring, she was matter of fact, she was honest, she was hardworking, she was GREAT!!! I don't take for granted the 14 years I was priviledged to have been her granddaughter in law....although, she NEVER made me feel like an in law......if you were to ask all of the inlaws......they would all say the same thing. I am so thankful both of my children were loved by her. I am thankful we have so many wonderful memories of her to carry us through this life. Great, you are missed with each passing day!!!

This year has also brought some disappointment with Brad's job situation. We are still praying the Lord's will be done in our lives. We are diligently seeking HIS wisdom. The Lord knows all about it and we are trusting in HIM....although sometimes we ponder why?

WE are BLESSED beyond measure and truly know where our treasures are.

With this upcoming New Year just a few days away....there are SO MANY things I want to improve on and there are some goals that Brad and I want to attain. I am going to list some of them so I can keep myself accountable.

1. Become a better wife and mother. I strive at this daily...but fall so short in so many areas. My husband and children deserve for me to do better. I think a lot of this can be attained by becoming a better steward of studying God's word.

2. Be a better soul winner. I need to REALLY get REAL and serious about so many people dying and going to HELL and it is my obligation to tell them.

3. Be a better teacher to my children with homeschooling.

4. Be a better friend. I need to worry more about being there for others and being a blessing to them than to worry about being blessed.

5. Continue to lose weight. Really get focused again and be fit and trim by summer....and KEEP IT OFF.....also to encourage my husband to lose some weight.

6. Be MORE organized.

GOALS:

1. Become more financially stable

2. Purchase a home

3. Brad find a stable job ( I would love for him to find one he enjoys........I know selfish....but I want him to be happy)

4. Really build up my photography business!!!

Well....there are a few things to strive to be better at......I've got my work cut out for me because I know who I am dealing with....ME!!!

Take care and be thankful for each and every day the Lord hath made!!!

H@PPY BIRTHD@Y EMM@!!!

We celebrated Emma's 5th birthday and it was WONDERFUL!! She had a great birthday! I can't believe my BABY is the BIG 5. She truly has been a joy and pleasure to have. I thank God every day for the gifts of my children. I can not imagine my life without them and I have completely forgotten what it was like before I had them. OH, the JOYS of parenting!!! Friday, we get to celebrate Tyler's birthday, he will be 12!!! My oh my how time flies when you're having fun!!!

WOW....it has been TOO long since my last blog!! LIFE has been Busy with a capital B!!!

Speaking of life...it has been great! The kids have been healthy and we are now enjoying this Christmas season. Emma will be 5 tomorrow and Tyler will be 12 on Friday.......I CAN'T believe my babies aren't babies anymore. Makes me feel sad :( Anywho.....Emma always keep us laughing with her comments....here are a couple that she has said the last few days....

For some reason she now is so upset at the possibility of getting married....I have no idea where this thought came from. But the other night, as we were snuggling on the couch, she held me real tight and in the saddest voice said,"I don't want to get married, I want to stay with y'all FOREVER." Of course, her daddy was ALL OVER that idea like butter on a biscuit!!

Friday night she comes to me and tells me that she is hot and needs her temperature checked. She likes having it checked because she can read the digital screen that either has a happy face or sad face. So I proceeded to take it and I said,"Emma, you don't have a fever, do you feel bad?" She said, "No, I don't feel bad, I just feel.....OLD." LOL......really? wow, oh to be turning 5!

Anywho...she is our little entertainer. I love my babies so much...even though Tyler is just a couple of inches shorter than I am. (although, that is not saying much either,lol).

Well, I do want to tell you about an AWESOME offer that shutterfly is offering. I love shutterfly and use them regularly for my personal photos.

For bloggers, they are offering 50 free greeting cards. I know, right? Awesome deal!! I just signed up to receive mine and they should be sending me an update by email in a couple of days, so I will keep you posted. http://bit.ly/sfly2010 go to this link and sign up to get yours today!!!!

I will be updating with pictures from this weeks birthdays! Hope everyone has a BLESSED day!

BEACH BOUND BABY!!!!

Well, we will be headed down to Panama City on Sunday. We leave on Saturday night when Brad gets off work to head to my mom's and drop off Bella~Boo!! Then we head over to Great's house to have a Father's Day breakfast with him and then to the BEACH!!!! You have NO idea how excited I am just to get away and forget about the stresses of life for a week and most importantly to enjoy being with my hubby for an entire week!!! WOOHOO!!!! He works SO hard and SO many hours, he totally deserves this vacation and it is a long time in the making! Can you tell I am excited????

Tuesday, a limb fell on our car during a storm and busted out the windshield, thankfully, they came out yesterday and fixed it. I predicted this would happen.....but NO ONE listened to me!! LOL!!!

I have had a pretty good week....really busy, but good!!! Thankful ALWAYS for the Lord's provision in our lives. I am praying daily to be in His will and for Him to lead us where He wants us to go. Most times I get in the way of what HE wants and I do the things the way I want to do them and I am learning DAILY to depend on Him and stop relying on my own power. I love my Jesus!!!!

Well, folks, I reckon that is all that is going on in my world!!! Please keep praying for Erin Raffield........33 year old, mother of 2 babies with stage 4 colon cancer!!! She starts CHEMO on Monday! I am so thankful the Lord has protected our family from a tragedy like this. Will be back in two weeks. I will definately post pics of our vacation!!

See you soon!!

My beautiful daughter.....a true blessing and gift from above!

Seriously, the Lord has blessed my life with two of the most precious children. Each one of them is so special to me in their own way. I wanted to take a little time to tell you about my sweet Emma~loo. Not only is she beautiful, she is precious. She truly lights up my world and blesses my heart. She has her daddy wrapped and I must say, she's got a hold of me too!! She is funny, witty, a little sassy(LOL) and just an all around good child. She has a little more personality than Tyler did at this age. She LOVES her TyTy. He is her best friend, her buddy!! Tyler loves her just the same. I just can't imagine my life without my children. I thank the Lord for them everyday, for their health and protection from this wicked world. As soon as I get new pics of Tyler, I will post some. He is at that age where he could really care less about pictures. This is only 4 of the 60 pictures I took of Emma today. Every single one of them turned out beautifully and it only took us about 15 minutes. She is a natural. Thank you Lord for your mercies.....your grace.....your forgiveness and the MULTITUDE of blessings you send to me everyday! I am BLESSED!!

Today the weather outside is GORGEOUS!!! I can not believe how beautiful it is!! So, I've been away for a while, not that it much matter, not sure many, if any, people read my blog...LOL!! I need to do a better job of keeping up with it, but I fall short for sure on the updating thing.

It has been a sad couple of weeks around here. Still hard to believe that our sweet" Great" is not with us any more. I am a better person for knowing her!! She is a true inspiration to me and to all that loved and knew her!

I have got to get on track and lose some weight. The last year for us has been difficult and my body has paid the price. I guess that is what stress will do to you!! I have gained about 15 lbs in 9 months...OUCH....I know!!! I can so tell too.....in my clothes, in my attitude and other areas in my life. I need encouragement and prayer.

I am also SO READY for school to be OUT!!!! I would give anything to be able to send Tyler off to a GOOD, CHRISTIAN school. Not because I don't want to teach him, but because I feel I am failing him as a teacher, and a mom. This year has been so hard and demanding on me and I feel so much pressure......I feel like I am about to explode! Tyler has done great, it's been me!! Poor little guy!! He's a trooper and I love him so much.

Speaking of school, I was going to get started with little miss priss this year and haven't done near what I had wanted too.

UGH!!! I really could use the prayer. I want to be a better EVERYTHING!!! You name it, I am probably failing at it and I want to do better. My husband and my kids and my SAVIOR deserve more from me!!

Well, I know this blog was a little whiney and pity party 'ish.......but I really do need some prayer. I feel at times as though I feel like I am caving in with one arm stretched out for help.

Heartbroken

Sometimes when there is nothing left to say, when the tears have been flowing all day....all you can do it sit down and write. Today is my birthday and it has been one of the saddest days of my life. The highlight of my birthday is when the phone rings first thing in the morning and the first person's voice I hear is that of Brad's grandmother, Charlotte. Well, today, I didn't get that phone call. We received a devastating phone call instead. Charlotte and Jack were at their condo in Panama City and she got up this morning with a headache and then got sick. She collapsed and went unconscious. Needless to say from this morning until now, she is on life support. She had a brain embolism. They did surgery to drill a hole in her head to relieve the bleeding, but the Dr.s aren't hopeful. There is no brain activity. We are heartbroken and devastated. We are wanting to be there right now, but are trying to wait to see what the rest of the day holds. We are so close with her and she and Tyler have such a special bond. I just can't stop thinking about her and already missing her tremendously. Please pray for her, our family as we embark on these next few days. We can't know the future, but we know who holds the future. Thank you Lord for Charlotte and all that she means to me and so many other people.

Snow Day

We have had so much fun today! Yesterday as the snow began to fall, I just couldn't wrap my mind around that fact that each and every delicate snowflake is different and unique! Can't comprehend how many snowflakes have to fall to build up several inches. Our God is so amazing. He shows us His glory in so many miraculous ways. Today, the kids have had such a blast. They are back outside playing as I type. To hear them laugh and giggle is the best sound. Brad tried to go to work this morning and didn't make it up the hill, but has since given it another try and he made it! Here are a few pics for you to enjoy!

CONTENT

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. philipians 4:11

Everyday I am humbled by what the Lord is teaching me. I think I am an easy going, patient, kind person....but then when I really take a good look at myself, I can be up-tight, easily aggravated and mean.

I had a "moment" yesterday of these unattractive personality flaws and I am ashamed.

Yesterday, on Brad's day off we spent the day together just enjoying being a family. Went to the mall, had lunch together. Tyler and Brad worked on batting, throwing and catching for Tyler's baseball tryouts. And then, there it was, a GORGEOUS house for rent. I mean......my dream house!!! I begged Brad to stop by and go look at it and he complied. We didn't go in, but we could see in almost all of the windows, and the porhes...and the pool. I mean this was one beautiful home.

I had all of these thoughts about where I could put things and how I could decorate.....KNOWING GOOD AND WELL WE COULD NEVER AFFORD A HOUSE LIKE THIS. That's when I heard my husband say, "I should've put my foot down and said NO, we are not going to look at it." "I should've known better." This is when I began to tear up and the ugly came out. I immediately became depressed and started to have a pity party. It lasted a couple of hours and let me tell you, I physically felt terrible. I thought I was going to be sick.

I then had to walk into the garage, down the steps and into the place that I live.......someone else's basement. You talking about a slap in the face.

My husband didn't fuss, didn't get aggravated, he only said." I am sorry, I have failed as a provider, and I live with this everyday."

Brad left with Tyler to go to baseball and I felt so ashamed. Here my husband who had been through so much this last year. And the blessings we had received and I have a roof over my head and food on my table. I have healthy children, a husband who loves me and serves the Lord. I decided right then and there to change my attitude. It was amazing how much better I felt and by the time Brad got home, I was "CONTENT". I apologized to him, but couldn't take away from the feeling of failure. He still feels like he has let me down.

We as woman have to be so careful what we say and how we say things to our husbands. They need us to uplift them and encourage them. They have enough on their shoulders to bear without having a contentious wife at home.

Thank you Lord for showing me your love and your scripture. I still want a house of my own, but I am content with what God has provided us with. I am thankful!!

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. philipians 4:11

I should have been Crucified......

Here are the word to a song that I sing in a ladies' ensemble. Just read the words!! He took MY PLACE.......

I was guilty with nothing to, as they were coming to take me away. But then a voice from Heaven was heard that said, "Let him go, take me instead."

I should have been crucified, I should have suffered and died, I should have hung on the cross in disgrace, but Jesus, God's son took my place.

A crown of thorns, a spear deep in His side and the pain should have been mine. The rusty nails were meant for me, yet Christ took them and let me go free.

I should have been crucified, I should have suffered and died. I should have hung on the cross in disgrace, but Jesus, God's son took my place!

When I survey the Wondrous Cross

I am guilty!!!! I am so guilty of singing these beautiful hymns without paying much attention to the words. We get in this habit of singing with our head from memory and not with our heart! My brother Scott reminded me today of what an AMAZING song this is. " When I Survey the Wondrous Cross" We need to regain an appreciation for these well written songs and truly think upon the words of the song. Oh, how we forget that God sent His ONLY son to DIE on the cross for OUR sins. Jesus is just not a baby that lay in a manger at Christmas time....He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. The Prince of Peace, Our Father, My Savior!! He was, He is and He is to come. WOW......just read the words to this song. If your heart doesn't become stirred after reading, then......Hmmmm? Thanks Scott for the reminder!! Love ya!

When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss,
And pour contempt on all my pride.

Forbid it, Lord, that I should boast,
Save in the death of Christ my God!
All the vain things that charm me most,
I sacrifice them to His blood.

See from His head, His hands, His feet,
Sorrow and love flow mingled down!
Did e’er such love and sorrow meet,
Or thorns compose so rich a crown?

His dying crimson, like a robe,
Spreads o’er His body on the tree;
Then I am dead to all the globe,
And all the globe is dead to me.

Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That were a present far too small;
Love so amazing, so divine,
Demands my soul, my life, my all.

To Christ, who won for sinners grace
By bitter grief and anguish sore,
Be praise from all the ransomed race
Forever and forevermore.

It's Friday!

It's Friday!!! Brad works 1~9 today, so we will be staying in tonight! Just cleaning up around the house and enjoying my children. Emma keeps pulling out toys and making a mess! Not much going on this weekend. I have to clean the church tomorrow and Tyler will be having some friends spend the night tomorrow. We have Maren tomorrow as well! The house should be busy tomorrow with 5 youngin's running around! Church on Sunday and then back to business as usual on Monday!!

Today I am so thankful for all of the countless blessings in my life. I am one blessed girl!! I am so thankful I don't have to measure myself to worldly standards, only biblical standards. I am an heir of the KING!!

I had trio practice last night and we are working on "Then Came The Morning" for Easter! WOW, what a powerful song. Gives me goosebumps. Just listening to the words! DEATH had LOST and LIFE had WON!! My Saviour LIVES!!

Cough, Cough......sneeze!!

Whatever this dreadful virus is we have, I am SO OVER IT and ready for it to be gone!! I have had many colds before in my lifetime,but this.....takes the cake!! I am well on my way to week number 2 with this stuff. I can deal, ya know, but my sweet kiddos have it now and I feel so bad for them. I can tell I am getting better. I still have so much congestion and still sound like a man. Poor Tyler is hit with it bad right now, he is in the beginning stages, which might I add.......hit hard and furious! There has been no building up to a cold, it is just happens full blown! Emma is struggling as well! My concern was it turning into pneumonia for me, since I have had it twice before, but hopefully I have managed to keep that at bay! I am so ready for some warm weather! We have cabin fever. Since we live in a basement, it can get really bad. We have no windows to see outside and it can get very closed in! So warm weather is what the Dr. ordered! Well, now that I have gotten that off of my chest, I feel better!!!

I truly love my life. EVERYTHING about it is so great! I have a wonderful, hard working husband. Two adorable, well behaved children. Great family, friends! God has truly taken care of us.

On my heart today........all of the horror over in Haiti! What utter desperation and despair! Parents searching for children, children searching for parents, people trapped in fallen buildings. No water or food! Dead bodies riveting the streets!! I can not imagine. I am brokenhearted when I watch the news! A country already so poor!

Well, I need to get busy with school! Did I mention, I am also ready for summer break??? Tyler is working really hard and I am proud of him! I know it's not easy having me as a teacher and his dad as his principal.......but the kid takes everything with a grain of salt!! Hope everyone has a TERRIFIC FRIDAY and a great weekend!!!

Happenings in my world!!

I am thinking......how I can't wait to feel better!!

I am thankful......for wonderful friends! All of the love I have felt this week, friends offering to cook, clean, run errands and then for the meds that were brought to me. I have felt loved!

From the kitchen.....not sure.....still having a hard time standing for long periods of time without getting winded! My house is mess, hasn't been cleaned since last Wed.

I am wearing......turtleneck, denim gauchos

I am hearing.....poor little Emma coughing and sniffling. I gave her this awful JUNK :(

Around the house......just me and Emmaloo......quiet! Tyler is at work with his daddy!

The rest of the week.....hopefully well enough to go to church on Wed., school and gotta get this house back in order!

Handmade Gifts!!!

I thoroughly enjoyed making these gifts for Christmas this year. Some people bake, some sew, but I love to craft. Give me a glue gun, ribbon and scrapbook paper and send me on my merry way!! I would love to make these and sell them, so if you know anyone who would like one of these initial wall plaques, then give me a hollar~~

It's SNOWING!!

I know, I know!! You northerners are laughing really hard right now! It started snowing about 2 and it is now almost 11 and it has almost stopped. There is a nice ground cover, but I am certain it is probably less than an inch!! Wish it had snowed just a little more so the kids could go out and play in it. Emma really wants to make a snow angel!! I am feeling a little under the weather. Not sure where this chest pain and cough have come from, but they have arrived. I am getting sleepier and sleepier by the minute because the NYQUIL I took is starting to take effect. The kids are in bed, but Emma is complaining that she doesn't feel well. She has had another headache the entire day, so that concerns me somewhat, but hoping by morning, she is as good as new!! Well, tomorrow I am going to be cooking Potato~Corn Chowder for the first time......let's hope it turns out!! A good cup of soup sounds SOOOOO GOOOOOD right now! Everyone take care, drive safely and have a blessed night~~

Happenings in my world!!

I read another blog and I so enjoy her weekly updates. It's simple, but I like simple.

I am thinking........about all of the things I need to accomplish today and how much I dread going out in the cold to get it all done!

I am thankful........for my wonderful husband who works so hard to take care of us. I am forever grateful and am praying for a teaching job to become available this next school year!

From the kitchen........homemade pancakes for breakfast, coffee. On the counter, a pork tenderloine thawing out for tonight.

I am wearing.......gray fleece bottoms, a red turtleneck and warm socks. I truly can not stand to be cold.

I am going........to party city today and then to church

I am hearing........Tyler turning his spelling book pages and reading allowed his spelling words and definitions.

Around the house.......fairly quiet today. Laundry to do and I need to make beds.

Plans for the rest of the week........Keeping Marebear this weekend, church on Sunday.